Week 1 : Self Portrait

self-por·trait

noun

1. 1.

   a portrait of an artist produced or created by that artist. (Found on google.com).

   
   

   
   

   After I post this portrait I expect you all to laugh. I'm what I like to think a funny person.  I'm a multi-tasker, 29 year old (soon to be 30), mother of three (young children under 4 years of age). I'm ADDICTED to coffee (prefer Starbucks) but will settle for my regular cup with flavored creamer and 4 sweet n lows. I love art, reading blogs, fashion, shopping (online mostly), googling, the color pink, having a million and one projects going at once, buying something because I have a coupon (this gets me in trouble...), Michaels, GLITTER, samples (I'm part of Birchbox), dancing in the rain (let's be realistic no one does that, I dance in the shower), Facebook, calling my family (sometimes I think they get annoyed but I love to talk to them, it's refreshing), my kids and taking their pictures (mostly posing them like what I find on Pinterest), hand-sanitzer, lip gloss (no preference as long as it's a shade of nude/pink), Victoria Secret's underwear (ONLY), leggings and yoga pants. That's just to name a few.

   

   
   

   So, this is ME! This is how I see myself. NOT GLAMMED UP, always drinking coffee in my favorite pink mug. That brown stuff on my face is a mud mask, I was trying (it was a sample from my Birchbox). I'm very RAW, and to the point. There was a point in my life that I  wouldn't leave the house without makeup on or without my hair done and definitely would never leave in yoga pants. Oh how times have changed. Now I don't leave the house WITH makeup on, and I could careless. After 3 babies, I now see the beauty in myself.  I'm a mom and have a fiancé who loves me.  I don't care if my hairs a mess and my eyeliner is under my eyes or mascara running, it's who I am now. My saggy breasts, scar on my tummy, weird looking belly button, stretch marks and love handles are me right now. I feel good in a sweater and leggings or yoga pants, I'm pretty sure there is NO ONE at Jewel I need to impress. Laugh all you want but when it comes down to it, the stain on my shirt or sideway ponytail or mascara running down my face, tell my story.  The stain on my shirt is from my 18 month old hugging me with his messy Cheetos fingers, and my sideway pony is because I was having a dance party with my 4 year old (Florida Georgia Line on repeat please). The mascara well that could be a lot of things, maybe my boys hugged me and made me feel so wonderful to be blessed to be their mommy, or Avri is growing so fast and I just want my last baby to stay a baby, or maybe the mascara is because I was laughing so hard with my kids because we were having such a fabulous day.  Whatever the reason, it's my reason and if I'm ok with it then that's all that matters.  Mud mask and all, that's who I am.

   
   

   Who are you? I challenge you to take a #selfie of yourself and who you are. Post it as your Facebook profile picture, or Twitter picture. Put it everywhere for everyone to see. Be proud. That is who YOU are!

   
   

   xoxo -J

So Your Friend's Having a Baby!

Let's be honest...  WE ALL LOVE BABIES!  Especially babies you can give back to their parents!  They are cute, we kiss on them, pinch their fat little cheeks and practically smother them.  OK, STOP THERE!  BACK OFF!  Listen, I know how it is...  The excitement, the Facebook posts; you want to be at the hospital the moment the baby arrives.  Sound like a great idea?  IT'S NOT!  Stop yourself now.  Want to be a great friend?!  Follow these simple tips.... 

• If you already have a child of your own, then you should know better.  Shame on you!  Unless she's personally asked you to be there when the baby arrives, give your friend a little space.  Your friend just pushed a watermelon out of her WHOOHAA!  Or even worse, her guts were cut open.  GIVE HER A BREAK!  Let her settle in. That baby isn't going anywhere and her family and in-laws are already in the room whens she arrives from recovery.  She'll love you for giving her space!  Text her to ask when a good time to stop by is, either at home or at the hospital. Whenever SHE's ready.
• Want a picture of the baby?!  Let's be honest, mama will NOT be taking a picture of anything after she just pushed out a 6lb baby from her body.  Text the baby daddy!  MEN, THIS IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY!  Friend, you will get LOTS of pictures of the baby.  I promise!  Just NOT THE SECOND the baby arrives.  Be PATIENT!

• You want to post adorable pictures of the new baby all over FACEBOOK and TAG mommy & daddy in it?! UMMMM NOOOOOO!  NO NO NO NO NO!!!!!  THIS IS THEIR DAY!  To put it bluntly, if they aren't posting, NEITHER ARE YOU!  Let them be the one's to announce their baby when they are ready.  It may be the minute the baby is out, or a week later but don't steal their thunder.  Let them be the one's to share their excitement.  DO NOT post pictures to FACEBOOK without the parent's okay.  BOTH PARENTS!

• Don't ask if she needs anything and then sound inconvenienced when she asks you to help.  Are you a good friend?!  I've had 3 babies of my own and will NEVER show up without something for my new parent friend. Text or call to ask.  Seriously....  There is always something!  COFFEE? AND NOT THE DAMN HOSPITAL COFFEE! Get her a real coffee!  Starbucks PLEASE!  And REAL FOOD!

• You want to bring a gift?  PLEASE DO NOT BRING MORE CLOTHES!  She just had a baby!  Do you really think she's going to get to wash clothes in her free time?  NO!  She's going to be napping!  Unless you WASH ALL THE CLOTHES in Dreft before you bring them, don't bring any damn clothes!  They'll literally get stashed away in piles of gifts, with tags still in tact and baby will never wear them because mama was just too exhausted taking care of a new life to give any of them a second thought.  Your gesture is nice, but the perfect gift is just to ask what is needed.  Diapers?  Wipes?  Formula?  Groceries?  A Gallon of Milk?  Maybe she needs gas drops from the pharmacy!  Any little errand you can run for her will be greatly appreciated by any new parent.    

• Visiting is fun, but with a new baby many parents rather relax and NAP.  Babies for the most part eat every 2-3 hours.  They usually have nights and days mixed up in the beginning; which means MOM is working OVERTIME and even though she says she'd love to see you, she's most likely already smothered from guests wanting to come to see the new baby.  Want to see the baby?!  GREAT!  Tell mommy you'll stop by after she feeds the baby (if breast feeding), or ask when a good time is to stop by if bottle feeding.  Remind her not to put on regular clothes, or makeup, or worry about doing her hair.  It's not needed and remind her that you love her just the same!  Let her know that you are coming over to help her out.  Put some laundry in the wash, watch the baby while she naps, run to the store for her, clean the bathroom.  Whatever she needs... YOU DO IT!  HELP HER!  She may not flat out say, 'I need help,' but I'm telling you, if you tell her you're going to do something... she's going to let you!  GET OUT THAT VACUUM and go to town!  BE HER BI*CH for the day!

• You want to stop by for lunch or dinner?  SURE, but BRING THE FOOD!  Do not expect these sleep deprived, new parents to cook a damn meal!  ARE YOU NUTS?  Even if they offer, say “NO, I GOT IT, what's your favorite meal?”  Bring the meal and if you really want your friend to love you, bring a meal she can freeze.  It makes a great gift and it will be much appreciated.  Even more so over new, adorable, MUST BUY clothes.  The best gift I received after my third baby was my when my friend showed up with pre-cooked meals and things I needed – snacks, diapers!

• DO NOT STARE AT HER ENGORGED BREASTS!  DO NOT STARE WHILE SHE'S FEEDING!  STARING IS RUDE! Look elsewhere....  The TV, the wall... anywhere else but her boobs!

• If you go to the hospital to visit because the parents already said 'Yes it's okay,' DON'T overstay your welcome, and no taking a million pictures of mom and baby.  HELLO?!  She's swollen, has no makeup on, has ratty hair and black under her eyes.  She's feeling far from glamorous.  DEAR LORD, HAVE A LITTLE COMMON SENSE!

• My best is advice is to just be a friend.  A normal and good friend.  Wash your hands.  Ask if she needs anything.  Stay away if you are sick.  Be kind and help out.

If you follow these simple steps, any new parent will love to have you visit every week!  

-xox J 

Bring it on 2014!

So here it is... the BIG COUNTDOWN... has come and gone. The New Year always brings a FRESH START. This year I've decided to make my resolutions a little bit more "realistic."  1. Focus on Blogging more... I actually made a calendar. I can't wait! 2. I want to drink 8 glasses of water a day. 3. Walk twice a week. 4. Complete and Blog on a 52 WEEK PHOTO CHALLENGE! ( Week one : SELFIE!) 5. Get Organized. ( with three kids it seems impossible)  Those are my top five. I got about 15 MORE to do but they are silly personal ones... you know stop bit*thing so much, have sex everyday (it's healthy for you and your spouse, PUT OUT!)... there's so many. For now that's all my first official post is complete. Take a minute today and give yourself 5 REALISTIC goals for 2014.  Put them on your fridge, dresser, bathroom mirror, somewhere you will see it every day. It will help you accomplish your resolutions. Cheers to the New Year! Happy 2014! <3 xo J